Learning Who I Am

I’ve noticed, while talking with others, that I will often express my opinion, thoughts, feelings, ideas, etc. before asking theirs. Which I do ultimately do. I’ve just always chided myself for not putting others above myself.

I just sent an email to a new acquaintance about art. I noticed that, once again, I stated my inspiration before asking hers.

In that moment, I realized something else: it’s not that I’m being selfish, that’s just how I communicate. I’m an INFJ. Ni, then Fe. And that’s okay.

Ideas do hold value on their own. I do very much care about how others think and feel, but so often I’ve felt bad for stating my own ideas first. The thing is, I don’t want the conversation to be all about me; that’s just my segue into a deeper conversation concerning others. It’s not that I don’t care, or that I don’t value them.

So, maybe I’ll stop being so hard on myself. Maybe someday I’ll learn to fully embrace all of the nuances and complexities that come with being an INFJ.