Fear And Hope

Rain_LeafIt’s a rainy, dreary day today. It would be perfect for a cup of tea, good book, and a blanket. Sometimes I focus so much on having something important to say that I forget to say anything at all.

Last night I went to a book study. It was a women’s group, about 13 or so women were there. I sat and listened mostly, inside my own world of thoughts.

By the end of it all I had hardly said anything, and was focused on my own things, my own life.

Isn’t it amazing how we can do that?

I’ve had a tendency to detach. I used to be quiet, but primarily observing everything that was going on around me, lately it’s like I’m living in another dimension.

Fear.

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Fear separates me from the love that those around me are willingly trying to give. I won’t let them get close because I’m afraid of being hurt.

I’m learning and growing. It really hit me this morning just how much I’ve recovered over the past few months. It’s been amazing. I feel like I’m starting to get myself back.

"Fear does not prevent death, It prevents life." - Naguib Mahfouz  Image Credit
“Fear does not prevent death, It prevents life.” – Naguib Mahfouz
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I go back and forth between being quiet to see, and being quiet in fear.

The thing about fear is that without it, we could never be brave. Feeling the fear isn’t wrong, but giving in to it can be. (Obviously there are times that it’s there for a good reason and we need to be wise and heed that.)

I feel so much hope realizing that parts of me are beginning to return. I feel so much hope, feeling like maybe I can heal. I am healing. I don’t need to be afraid.

I still have my little introvert bubble, and I’m still a private person, but there’s both a positive way to incorporate that, and a negative. I’m beginning to be more positive again.

I’m finding hope. And that hope feels so good.

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Even in darkness, when we can find the light. If we reach for it, He will restore us.

I’ve had times that I’ve doubted my worth or value, I’m starting to regain the strength I need to stand.

I’m so excited to see what this group has to hold, I’m so happy to have the opportunity to be surrounded by people full of love and compassion.

Encouragement can be hard to come by sometimes.

If you’re down today, I just want you to know, you have value far beyond what you can even imagine. Don’t give up yet, there is light at the end of the tunnel. It starts out small at first with just a tiny trickle, but soon it will be like a rushing stream.

Know there is hope today.

No matter how broken, or dirty, or damaged we feel, God can use it for something beautiful.

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