I keep going in circles. It seems like no matter how much I think I’ve changed, I always end up back in the same place. Then I start over and draw over the circle again, rehashing the problem in my own mind. Round and round it goes.
“I keep on chasing the wrong things, and coming up empty.”
It’s not that I’m exactly doing the same thing and expecting a different result. It’s more often that I do something different and still end up in the same place. Maybe there’s something important I need to learn from it first. I kind of wish those lessons were easier to learn and that they’d be revealed sooner.
I’m quite impatient at times.
Sometimes I wonder if there’s a way out of this mess. Then something else happens and everything becomes even more complicated. Or am I just complicating it in my own mind?
These are the moments we need to trust God and allow ourselves to be renewed. I don’t know where the light is at the end of this tunnel, I don’t know how long it will take, or if we’ll ever get there. All I know is that I need to find a way to trust.
The pain becomes too great and I can’t contain it on my own. I still have a spark of hope, and that’s what I hold on to.