Today I’m spending a sick day at home. Somehow in the fever daze I found myself drawn back to a book I had written a couple years ago. I’ve written this book over and over again, I’ve torn things out, added things in, rearranged, edited, rewritten from scratch… You get the idea.
But reading it today I was somehow able to be a little less critical of myself, and actually halfway enjoy the story. It makes me want to consider picking it back up again, finishing the missing gaps in the second half, and maybe doing something with it.
I’m so afraid to show my writing to other people. This blog is one thing, I’ve tried to squash my perfectionistic tendencies by writing stream of consciousness and hitting publish. Occasionally I’ll allow myself to read over it, but oftentimes I don’t, because if I do, I know I’ll never post anything at all.
Because of the state this book is in, I really can’t do that. So I have to try to find a balance if I do decide to pick it up again. I’ve written a few books, but this is the one I really cared about, and I think sometimes that’s the most difficult type to write, because when the product doesn’t match our vision… It just ends up disappointing and leaving a lot to be desired.
I’m running completely off track though. I came here to ask a question.
So in this book I have two very different worlds. One of them is more the origin/backstory that lead to my character developing PTSD (one of the things that was “accidentally” added). In the current state, I have all the origin world in the beginning, and then transition away from it. But reading it again, I was wondering if it would be more effective to have that laced throughout in PTSD flashbacks. (There are already some of those in the later part.) And I was wondering what all of you think?
I’d love to hear your thoughts! I know it’s hard to give an answer with so little information, but which way sounds the most interesting to you at first glance?